How to Feel Safe in Your Body (Even If You Never Have)
If the idea of feeling safe in your body seems foreign, you’re not alone. Many people—especially those who have experienced chronic stress, trauma, or burnout—struggle with a deep sense of unease within themselves. Maybe you feel constantly on edge, disconnected, or numb. Perhaps relaxation feels impossible, or even unsafe.
But here’s the good news: Safety is something you can cultivate, step by step, using somatic practices that help your nervous system shift out of survival mode and into a state of calm connection.
Why Safety in the Body Feels Elusive
Your nervous system is wired to protect you. If you’ve spent years (or a lifetime) in high-stress environments, navigating trauma, or pushing through exhaustion, your body has learned to stay on high alert. This can manifest as:
Chronic tension or tightness
A racing mind or difficulty relaxing
Feeling "checked out" or disconnected from sensations
Difficulty trusting yourself or others
Emotional numbness or feeling "too much" all at once
If you’ve never felt truly safe in your body, it’s not your fault. Your nervous system has simply been adapting to survive. But it is possible to gently teach your body what safety can feel like.
Steps to Cultivate a Sense of Safety in Your Body
1. Start with Noticing (Without Judgment)
Instead of forcing yourself to feel safe, begin by simply noticing how you feel in your body. Take a moment to ask yourself:
What sensations are present? (Tightness, warmth, tingling, numbness?)
Where do I feel tension?
Is there any part of my body that feels even slightly neutral or at ease?
Bringing gentle awareness to your body, without trying to change anything, is the first step toward feeling more at home within yourself.
2. Engage in Gentle Somatic Practices
Since safety is a body-based experience, somatic (body-focused) techniques can help create a sense of calm. Here are a few to try:
Orienting: Look around your space and name five things you see. This helps signal to your nervous system that you are in a safe environment.
Grounding: Press your feet into the floor, feeling the connection to the earth beneath you. Notice how it feels to have solid support.
Havening Touch: Cross your arms and gently stroke your upper arms, mimicking the soothing sensation of a hug.
Slow, Low Breathing: Inhale slowly through your nose, letting your belly expand. Exhale even more slowly through your mouth. This helps shift your nervous system from a fight-or-flight state into a more regulated one.
3. Create Micro-Moments of Safety
Instead of expecting to feel completely at ease all the time, start with tiny moments of safety. Ask yourself:
Where do I feel the safest? (Maybe it’s under a warm blanket, in a quiet room, or in nature.)
Are there small things that make me feel more settled? (A warm cup of tea, soft clothing, soothing music?)
How can I give myself more of these moments throughout my day?
These small cues of comfort help build a foundation of safety over time.
4. Move at Your Own Pace
If you’ve spent years in survival mode, it’s okay if safety feels unfamiliar at first. Healing isn’t about forcing yourself to feel safe—it’s about creating conditions where your body learns that it doesn’t have to stay on high alert. Go slowly, be patient, and offer yourself the same kindness you would to a dear friend.
Final Thoughts
You deserve to feel safe in your body. If that feels like a distant goal right now, remember: safety isn’t an all-or-nothing state. It’s something you can build, moment by moment, with gentle awareness and somatic practices. Start small, listen to your body, and trust that over time, you can create a sense of home within yourself.
Want more support in reconnecting with your body? Sign up for my free mini-course, Somatic Techniques for Everyday Stress, where I guide you through simple practices to help you feel more grounded, calm, and at ease.
